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Oldies but goodies
Wife: "Why don't you ever call out my name when we're making love?"
Husband: "Because I don't want to wake you up"
A man said to his wife: "Honey, what do you say that tonight we change positions?"
"OK," she said. "You stand by the ironing board and I'll lie on the sofa and watch TV"
I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself now."
Q: How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
A: It's not hard.
Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 lbs.
Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes.
Q: What is it when a man talks dirty to a woman?
A: Sexual harassment.
Q: What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man?
A: $3.99 a minute.
Q: How are women and rocks alike?
A: You skip across the flat ones.
Q: Did you hear about the new blond paint?
A: It's not real bright, but it's cheap, and spreads easy.
Q: Whats the difference between a 90's woman and a computer?
A: A 90s woman won't accept a three-and-a-half-inch floppy.
Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A: Because breasts don't have eyes.
Q: Whats the difference between a blond and a brick?
A: When you lay a brick, it doesn't follow you around for two weeks whining.
Q: Whats a blonds favorite nursery rhyme?
A: "Hump-me Dump-me"
Q: What do women and tornadoes have in common?
A: They moan like hell when they come and take the house when they leave.
Husband: "Because I don't want to wake you up"
A man said to his wife: "Honey, what do you say that tonight we change positions?"
"OK," she said. "You stand by the ironing board and I'll lie on the sofa and watch TV"
I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself now."
Q: How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
A: It's not hard.
Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 lbs.
Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes.
Q: What is it when a man talks dirty to a woman?
A: Sexual harassment.
Q: What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man?
A: $3.99 a minute.
Q: How are women and rocks alike?
A: You skip across the flat ones.
Q: Did you hear about the new blond paint?
A: It's not real bright, but it's cheap, and spreads easy.
Q: Whats the difference between a 90's woman and a computer?
A: A 90s woman won't accept a three-and-a-half-inch floppy.
Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A: Because breasts don't have eyes.
Q: Whats the difference between a blond and a brick?
A: When you lay a brick, it doesn't follow you around for two weeks whining.
Q: Whats a blonds favorite nursery rhyme?
A: "Hump-me Dump-me"
Q: What do women and tornadoes have in common?
A: They moan like hell when they come and take the house when they leave.
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