Return of the King

[Gurm]

Warning! Spoilers ahead! For those people who refuse to take an interest in literature that's older than they are...

-------------------------

They defeat Sauron.

Frodo loses a finger but otherwise escapes unscathed.

Saruman bites it.

Gollum falls into the volcano, with Frodo's finger.

Theoden is slain.

Eowyn defeats the Nazgul (with a little help from Merry).

Denethor dies, tries to take Faramir with him, fails.

Arwen & Aragorn get hitched.

Lots of orcs die.

Sam & Frodo beat a giant spider.

-------------------------

- Gurm

P.S. This was a piece of satire aimed squarely at Dave, involuntary thread-censorer.

[SitFlyer]

That's mean

[The PIT]

Shucks Gurm you spoiled it.

Oh I forgot I read the book.

[Topha]

Nice summary, you forgot to mention one thing though:

--- Spoiler Warning!!! ---

Eowyn and Faramir get hitched as well

-----

[J1NG]

Gurm

Can you provide a little more space between the spoiler line and spoilers itself? Some of us are on really high res screens and can see quite far down a page, so that one or two line gap isn't really enough.

J1NG

[knirfie]

even at 1024 you can see everything except the last line, to bad i already read the book twice...

[The PIT]

Only twice !!!!

[Gurm]

Oh shucks darn lessee...

MORE SPOILERS AHEAD:

-------------------













Yeah Faramir and Eowyn hook up. *SCHWING*

Legolas and Gimli ... err ... form a lasting "bond".

Everyone except Merry, Pippin, Aragorn and Arwen goes over the sea to the undying lands. Yeah, even Legolas and Gimli eventually.

Sam hooks up with Rosie, has little Samlings. Names one Elanor (played by Sean Astin's real-life daughter, no less!), after the flowers that ... never ... made it into the first movie. *sigh*

- Gurm

[Jon P. Inghram]

OMG, that means they don't just end the movie with the destruction of the ring?!? WOOOT!

[The PIT]

Sorry it's still here.

I'm just thinking on suitable punishment.

[Admiral]

Ethiopian sollution ?

[The PIT]

Way down inside.
Who lotta love.

By the way I've still got the ring.

[Brian Ellis]

Re: Return of the King

Originally posted by Gurm
people who refuse to take an interest in literature that's older than they are...

Speak for yourself

[Dilitante1]

didnt Frodo and Sam-wise get hitched too?

after reading this i was sure it was destiny

http://www.bellaonline.com/misc/lotr/sam.asp

[Gurm]

They won't end with the destruction of the ring, no. There's too much wrap-up. At the VERY least, they'll have the marriage of Aragorn & Arwen, the betrothal of Faramir and Eowyn, and the return to the shire (so Samwise & Rosie can hook up). Then everyone will pile on boats to the undying lands.

BUT... it's really up in the air whether they'll have the "scouring of the shire" or not, and it would be a CRYIN' shame if they left it out.

- Gurm