The WalMart Greeter

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  • ALBPM
    Super MURCer
    • Aug 1999
    • 3868
    #1

    The WalMart Greeter

    As I was retrieving a shopping cart in Wal-Mart yesterday a particularly unkempt,
    unattractive and mean spirited woman who actually reeked of body odor pushed me aside.

    Shoving past me, the woman snarled at her kids, almost knocking another
    older lady down, grabbed the first cart and swung it around, hitting an older
    man working there as a Wal-Mart Greeter.

    As she pulled the cart away from the Greeter's stomach, in a kind and
    friendly voice the Greeter said, while gesturing towards the two children
    "Are they twins?"

    Glaring at him she snapped back saying, "No you old fool, the brat's 9
    and the little witch is 7, are you so blind you think they look alike?"

    "No," calmly replied the Greeter, "I just couldn't believe you got laid twice".

    God loves those old people.
    "Never interfere with the enemy when he is in the process of destroying himself"
    Tags: None
    • Dr Mordrid
      Moderator
      • Apr 2001
      • 26592
      #2
      Dr. Mordrid
      ----------------------------
      An elephant is a mouse built to government specifications.

      I carry a gun because I can't throw a rock 1,250 fps

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        • Claymonkey
          Super MURCer
          • Dec 2000
          • 1871
          #3
          ...... THAT is awesome
          Wikipedia and Google.... the needles to my tangent habit.
          ________________________________________________

          That special feeling we get in the cockles of our hearts, Or maybe below the cockles, Maybe in the sub-cockle area, Maybe in the liver, Maybe in the kidneys, Maybe even in the colon, We don't know.

            Comment

            • Jammrock
              The Berserker
              • Aug 1999
              • 8661
              #4
              Is this a joke or a true first hand story?
              “Inside every sane person there’s a madman struggling to get out”
              –The Light Fantastic, Terry Pratchett

                Comment

                • Technoid
                  Super MURCer
                  • Sep 1999
                  • 7645
                  #5
                  What is a "WalMart Greeter" ?
                  If there's artificial intelligence, there's bound to be some artificial stupidity.

                  Jeremy Clarkson "806 brake horsepower..and that on that limp wrist faerie liquid the Americans call petrol, if you run it on the more explosive jungle juice we have in Europe you'd be getting 850 brake horsepower..."

                    Comment

                    • Tjalfe
                      Super MURCer
                      • Nov 2002
                      • 3053
                      #6
                      a walmart greeter is a person hired to just welcome people to the store as they enter. That is it.. sometimes point out sales and direct you to the shopping carts
                      We have enough youth - What we need is a fountain of smart!


                      i7-920, 6GB DDR3-1600, HD4870X2, Dell 27" LCD

                        Comment

                        • Jammrock
                          The Berserker
                          • Aug 1999
                          • 8661
                          #7
                          Originally posted by Tjalfe View Post
                          a walmart greeter is a person hired to just welcome people to the store as they enter. That is it.. sometimes point out sales and direct you to the shopping carts

                          Typically they are cute elderly people or disabled people. Thus providing a job for people who normally might not be able to do much for Walmart. It's one of the few good things about Walmart.
                          “Inside every sane person there’s a madman struggling to get out”
                          –The Light Fantastic, Terry Pratchett

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