A christmas stroy

[Sasq]

Got this in the email

Christmas Story

One particular Christmas a long time ago,
Santa was getting ready for his annual trip......
But there were problems everywhere. Four of his elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones, so Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule.

Then, Mrs Claus told him that her mother was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more. Then when he went to harness
the Reindeer, he found three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where. More stress.

Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the
toys. Frustrated, Santa went back into the house for a cup of coffee and a shot of whisky.

When he went to the cupboard he discovered the elves had hidden the liquor and there was nothing to drink. In his
frustration, he accidentally dropped the coffee pot and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor.

He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw it was made from. Just then, the doorbell rang and Santa cursed his way to the door. He opened the door and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas Tree.

The angel said, very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas Santa. Isn't it just a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Isn't it just a lovely tree? Where would you like me to stick it?"

And thus began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas Tree.

[Jammrock]

ROFL...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....

Jammrock

[cbman]

Need I say more

[Sasq]

And another good one from email

An elderly man in Adelaide calls his son in Sydney and says, "I hate to
ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing;
forty-five years of misery is enough."

"Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screams.

"We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the old man says.
"We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call
your sister in Brisbane and tell her," and he hangs up.

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck
they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of this."

She calls her dad immediately, and screams at the old man, "You are NOT
getting divorced! Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my
brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a
thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" and hangs up.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay," he says,
"They're coming for Christmas and paying their own airfares."


Edit: for those of you that don't know the geography, Adelaide (my home town) is about 1500km from sydent and close to 3000km from Brisbane and Australian Domestic Airfares until recently have not been cheap

[Guru]

Lol x2

[Kaj]

Great stories! Just the thing for a good laugh.