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Guinness Book of Records

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  • Guinness Book of Records

    Sleeping Beauty said, "I believe myself to be the most beautiful girl in the world." Tom Thumb said, "I must be the smallest person in the world." Quasimodo said, "I absolutely have to be the ugliest person in the world." They decided to go to the Guinness Book of World Records to have their claims verified. Sleeping Beauty went first and came out looking deliriously happy. "It's official, I AM the most beautiful girl in the world," Tom Thumb went next and emerged triumphant, "I am officially the smallest person in the world." Sometime later, Quasimodo came out looking confused and said, "Who the hell is Camilla Parker Bowles?"
    Brian (the devil incarnate)

  • #2
    I heard it said that CPB was going to join the Grand National next year (some sort of horse racing thing). They just needed to find a jockey.
    Join MURCs Distributed Computing effort for Rosetta@Home and help fight Alzheimers, Cancer, Mad Cow disease and rising oil prices.
    [...]the pervading principle and abiding test of good breeding is the requirement of a substantial and patent waste of time. - Veblen

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    • #3
      Ow, ow, ow! That hurts
      Seth, are you ok? I`m peachy Kate. The world is my oyster. - Seth Gecko

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      • #4
        There has to be someplace in Guinness for the man who would prefer her over Diana, too.

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        • #5
          Bwhahahahahahahahehehehehehehehehehehe
          Last edited by Technoid; 20 April 2005, 11:43. Reason: Capslocks key
          If there's artificial intelligence, there's bound to be some artificial stupidity.

          Jeremy Clarkson "806 brake horsepower..and that on that limp wrist faerie liquid the Americans call petrol, if you run it on the more explosive jungle juice we have in Europe you'd be getting 850 brake horsepower..."

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          • #6
            That's funny, but is she really that horrid looking? I mean, I see uglier women on a daily basis.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by KvHagedorn
              There has to be someplace in Guinness for the man who would prefer her over Diana, too.
              Well, I'm not sure "the man" can really be classed as a top grade intellect. Many of his pronouncements show him to be approaching sub-normal, except when he is talking to his plants. That having been said, I suppose Camilla must have some attributes that appeal to him.

              One idiocy that has recently come to light is that he has access to the income from the Duchy of Cornwall estates, some £12M/year. Under the rules of his tenure, he is also allowed to borrow over £1M/year from the capital, but there are no stipulations about interest or repayments. The moron has been doing this, with no repayments or interest payments, for some time, thinking that the government auditors would never find out. They have applied pressure for the tap to be gently closed and the gentleman in question was miffed. A future Commonwealth Head of State???? PLEEEEEZE. I pray that the Good Lord may take him before his mother.
              Brian (the devil incarnate)

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