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Marharishi's wise words
• Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either, just **** off and leave me alone.
 The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a flat tyre.
 The darkest hours come just before the dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbour's milk and newspaper, that's the time to do it.
• Sex is like air. It only becomes really important when you aren't getting any.
 Don't aspire to become irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
 Remember, no one is listening until you fart.
 Never forget that you are unique, like everyone else.
 Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
 If you think nobody cares whether you're dead or alive, try missing a couple of mortgage payments
 Before you judge someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you judge them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
 If at first you don't succeed, avoid skydiving.
 Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
 Have you ever lent someone $20 and never seen that person again? It was probably worth it.
 If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
 Some days we are the flies; some days we are the windscreens.
 Don't worry; it only seems kinky the first time.
 The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a flat tyre.
 The darkest hours come just before the dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbour's milk and newspaper, that's the time to do it.
• Sex is like air. It only becomes really important when you aren't getting any.
 Don't aspire to become irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
 Remember, no one is listening until you fart.
 Never forget that you are unique, like everyone else.
 Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
 If you think nobody cares whether you're dead or alive, try missing a couple of mortgage payments
 Before you judge someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you judge them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
 If at first you don't succeed, avoid skydiving.
 Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
 Have you ever lent someone $20 and never seen that person again? It was probably worth it.
 If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
 Some days we are the flies; some days we are the windscreens.
 Don't worry; it only seems kinky the first time.
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