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Night Court was a funny TV series, but what happens there for real can also be entertaining. These incidents gleened from Court TV;
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Defense lawyer to the wife of a client:
"Your husband's trial date is likely going to be on Monday. I am not going to be here. I am going to be in Cape Cod. ... Have you been?"
June 30, 12:28 a.m.
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Defense attorney greeting his new client: "Hi. Have we met before?"
Defendant: "Yes."
Defense attorney: "That's too bad."
June 18, 9:31 p.m.
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Judge to out-of-state defendant:
"Hey! You live in South Plainfield, New Jersey. Stay on that side of the river!"
June 5, 10:44 p.m.
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Judge to a defense attorney, trying to piece together the defendant's family relations and stumbling over a regional inflection:
"'Ahhnt? His Ahhnt? I am from the Bronx. I say 'Ant.'"
May 17, 8:56 p.m
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Defense counsel: "Your honor, it is not my client's fault that you have a warrant in front of you."
Judge: "No? Then it must be because he didn't show up."
May 14, 9:12 p.m
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Judge to pothead: "Marijuana is for stupid people! Grow up!"
April 27, 9:12 p.m.
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A perp brought in on a warrant for narcotics possession wears a D.A.R.E. (Drug Abuse Resistance Education) T-shirt.
April 6, 10:08 p.m.
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Judge to a stammering defense attorney: "Take your time. We've got all night."
And then later to an underprepared prosecutor: "As long as we have the illusion of progress."
April 2, 9:16 p.m.
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Two defense attorneys discuss a pending case.
First attorney: "Where's the felony here?"
Second attorney: "In the prosecutor's mind."
March 28, 8:17 p.m.
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Defense attorney: "My client never owned a Chrysler. He was never in an accident in a Chrysler. And he certainly was never arrested for driving in reverse on the FDR Drive in a Chrysler."
March 22, 10:04 p.m
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Bailiff: "For the last time, put that camera away or I'm really going to make it disposable."
March 14 at 8:21 p.m.
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Bailiff: "People. When you get up, take your things with you."
Wry smile.
"Or consider them donated."
March 8 at 9:20 p.m.
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The Latina girl's long, shiny locks are piled so high on her head they add inches. But, as the story of her petty crimes unfolds, her hair descends slowly, theatrically, down her back.
She was caught making graffiti. During the crime her hair was pinned up, now the locks attain their final step of freedom right as the judge is about to make his ruling.
The paperwork on both sides of the aisle was not enough to confirm or refute her guilt, so the judge opts for a future court date and releases the teenager on her own recognizance.
Her younger sister waits for her in the gallery. Her air — and her hair — are much less frivolous. She has multiple bobby pins to keep her quaff exactly as intended.
When the two sisters meet, the older one starts to smile a smile of relief, but just as it appears on her face, the younger one smacks her three times on the back of the head.
She only has one word, but repeats it three times:
"Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
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Dr. Mordrid
===========
Defense lawyer to the wife of a client:
"Your husband's trial date is likely going to be on Monday. I am not going to be here. I am going to be in Cape Cod. ... Have you been?"
June 30, 12:28 a.m.
===========
Defense attorney greeting his new client: "Hi. Have we met before?"
Defendant: "Yes."
Defense attorney: "That's too bad."
June 18, 9:31 p.m.
===========
Judge to out-of-state defendant:
"Hey! You live in South Plainfield, New Jersey. Stay on that side of the river!"
June 5, 10:44 p.m.
===========
Judge to a defense attorney, trying to piece together the defendant's family relations and stumbling over a regional inflection:
"'Ahhnt? His Ahhnt? I am from the Bronx. I say 'Ant.'"
May 17, 8:56 p.m
===========
Defense counsel: "Your honor, it is not my client's fault that you have a warrant in front of you."
Judge: "No? Then it must be because he didn't show up."
May 14, 9:12 p.m
===========
Judge to pothead: "Marijuana is for stupid people! Grow up!"
April 27, 9:12 p.m.
===========
A perp brought in on a warrant for narcotics possession wears a D.A.R.E. (Drug Abuse Resistance Education) T-shirt.
April 6, 10:08 p.m.
===========
Judge to a stammering defense attorney: "Take your time. We've got all night."
And then later to an underprepared prosecutor: "As long as we have the illusion of progress."
April 2, 9:16 p.m.
===========
Two defense attorneys discuss a pending case.
First attorney: "Where's the felony here?"
Second attorney: "In the prosecutor's mind."
March 28, 8:17 p.m.
===========
Defense attorney: "My client never owned a Chrysler. He was never in an accident in a Chrysler. And he certainly was never arrested for driving in reverse on the FDR Drive in a Chrysler."
March 22, 10:04 p.m
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Bailiff: "For the last time, put that camera away or I'm really going to make it disposable."
March 14 at 8:21 p.m.
===========
Bailiff: "People. When you get up, take your things with you."
Wry smile.
"Or consider them donated."
March 8 at 9:20 p.m.
===========
The Latina girl's long, shiny locks are piled so high on her head they add inches. But, as the story of her petty crimes unfolds, her hair descends slowly, theatrically, down her back.
She was caught making graffiti. During the crime her hair was pinned up, now the locks attain their final step of freedom right as the judge is about to make his ruling.
The paperwork on both sides of the aisle was not enough to confirm or refute her guilt, so the judge opts for a future court date and releases the teenager on her own recognizance.
Her younger sister waits for her in the gallery. Her air — and her hair — are much less frivolous. She has multiple bobby pins to keep her quaff exactly as intended.
When the two sisters meet, the older one starts to smile a smile of relief, but just as it appears on her face, the younger one smacks her three times on the back of the head.
She only has one word, but repeats it three times:
"Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
=========
Dr. Mordrid