Things you don't want to hear - the REAL thread!

[Jon P. Inghram]

Leaving work: "Wasn't that where the car was parked?"

Arriving home: "Hmm, I was sure I didn't leave the back door open..."

On the answering machine: (a relative) "Are you there? My computer is running really slow and these ads keep popping up even when I'm not on the internet, call me when you get home!"

Upon opening the mailbox: "What's this really thick envelope, and why is it from the IRS?"

[The PIT]

Your application for the higher rate of attendance allowance has been turned down.

I.E although you're helping the state out by being a career and working full time we're not going to help you with the bills for any additional of the care.