What if you were fed up of the pressure and wanted a simple life?

[Fat Tone]

Say you were fed up of managing a million projects with competing deadlines and wanted a no-stress job.

Your mortgage is paid off, your cars are fairly recent, your partner brings in a small wage, your kids haven't gone to Uni yet.

What would you do?

[UtwigMU]

Say you were fed up of managing a million projects with completing deadlines and wanted a no-stress job.

Your mortgage is paid off, your cars are fairly recent, your partner brings in a small wage, your kids haven't gone to Uni yet.

What would you do?

rent out flat/house, go travelling or move somewhere warm

[cjolley]

My answer to that, so far, has been to keep plugging away.

[VJ]

unfortunately, cjolley has a point... keep pluggin away...

A change of job is always an option, but there is no saying if it would be better.

But perhaps do something that challenges you, perhaps more mentally than physically. Something that might seem crazy...
There was a veterenarian in my class for flying lessons, and when he started, he was in a similar situation. His daughters were just about to start uni, and the life basically was work, free time and occassional holiday. The lessons were an intellectual challenge (and he really wanted to pass, saying "I have to show my girls the 'old man' still can do it"), with a rewarding outcome. It does not have to be that extreme though, I saw similar situations in the diving school and even in tango lessons. Other example: a friend of my girlfiend's parents took up playing the guitar. He knows he won't be very good as he started much too late, but he enjoys it. My brother, who surfed a bit when he was younger, now got into kite surfing. He went on a 10 day trip to Tunisa, just for kite-surfing.
My girlfriend currently is very busy with writing her PhD, and it causes the necessary stress. So I've been trying to really make the days more extreme: work is work, but then free time really is free time. And sometimes it works better than other times...

People need some challenges... :-)

[UtwigMU]

Also, you may want to read "the 4 hour work week" book.

Recommend.

[Brian Ellis]

Well I do have a potential solution. Find an island in the sun, it need be neither big nor small. Find a property that suits you, by the sea, in the mountains, with a swimming pool or not, as you wish. Savour the local life and food and wine. Learn to be laid-back (yes this requires an apprenticeship). Relax and count your blessings, remembering that every day is Sunday. This is called retirement!

It's great!

[Fat Tone]

Work life balance is probably the key. 20 years until anyone will pay me a pension, too many commitments to give up work. I generally like my current job and employer, its just been full on for too long and will be for at least another month or two.
I have lots of other things in my life, but really struggling to find time for them at the moment, so they suffer.

[cjolley]

Next time you think it's impossible for your work to do without you remember that the cemeteries are full of indispensable men.

[Fat Tone]

It's not the first time that's been said! But the consequences of me not doing my job at the moment are quite likely major losses or negative impact for the company.

[cjolley]

Learn to delegate. I used to not be able to do that. It drove me crazy that my office mate wouldn't code the way I do. I've forced myself to let go some and, amazingly, even though things aren't done the way I would, they generally work and nothing at all has exploded.

[Jammrock]

I addition to everything else I would add, find a hobby. Writing, reading, meditation, gardening... something low stress that gets you to relax, is not horribly time consuming (and thus annoy a spouse), and well within budget.

Everything is easier handle when you can reduce stress.

[VJ]

Forgot to mention: we organize boardgame evenings on occasion. Simple snack food, and then either highly tactical boardgames (Agricola, Race for the galaxy, FireFly), or depending on the guests more entry level (Carcasson, Saboteur) or just fun games (Galaxy Trucker).
I don't fully agree that the hobby has to be low stress, but it has to be a different kind of stress. :-)

[Umfriend]

If you have issues balancing work and life then I have the perfect solution for you. Find a coach. My wife is an excellent one. I know nothing about it but it seems to me you need to consider where you are at, where you want to be and what it is that is holding you back from getting there. It seems clear you like your job but just have issues with certain aspects about it. It may be hard to discuss this at work/with your supervisor before you actually know what you want. Given that you like the job, it should not be anything unreasonable but it requires clarity and a certain level of assertiveness.

Also, if the company can't function without you functioning as you do currently, there is certain truck-risk (in the sense: what would happen if you were hit by a truck?). It is in their interest to realise this and, with your help, deal with that. Most likely, only you can tell them best how to do that.

Good luck.

[Fat Tone]

Thanks for the suggestions. I wrote that at a time of intense pressure, not long after discovering something had gone wrong a long time ago and only just come to light. It was someone else's fault but as manager I have to be accountable.

Hopefully that episode is behind me now, we will see.

The time has come for me to stop over-delivering with insufficient resource. I will be saying no a lot more, I will be demanding more time and budget for everything and I WILL BE DAMNED SURE to hold everyone accountable. That is the last time I carry the can for others.

I don't think a coach is likely, but I will delegate more. I have discovered there are some tech skills in a team that has spare capacity, and I will bring in consultants to take some load.

Not out the woods yet by a long stretch, but I have a slightly more optimistic view of things.

I'm still up for the no-stress life, but I really don't think that's a realistic option. Regular 9-5 attendance at a dead-end job doesn't actually appeal either.

VJ, I have plenty else going on to fill time outside work, just not enough time available to do them justice. Flying really appeals, I'm going to have to work on that somehow when the decks are clearer.

Recent events have also made me feel extremely exposed and vulnerable, and made me take stock of my security levels. I need to work on that too (aka stop spending!)

[VJ]

VJ, I have plenty else going on to fill time outside work, just not enough time available to do them justice. Flying really appeals, I'm going to have to work on that somehow when the decks are clearer.

Time is always the issue, also for us...
Recently, my girlfriend's parents were on holiday, and we had to go to their house every other day to check on things and take care of flowers (her mother grows orchids). But even though we had more duty's than normal, we still had more time for ourselves. It showed us that we have to plan things better, and perhaps just "force" relaxation time in the agenda. Easier said than done though...

Flying is great; but it takes a lot of planning. And it may all be for nothing if the weather is bad. So in that sense it is a bit problematic.