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Preaching to a bear
A Catholic Priest, a Baptist Preacher and a Rabbi all served as Chaplains
to the students of Vancouver University. They would get together two or
three times a week for coffee and to talk shop.
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One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really
all that hard, a real challenge would be to preach to a bear.
>
One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They would
all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert
it to their religion.
>
Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences.
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Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had
various bandages on his body and limbs, went first.
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'Well,' he said, 'I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism.
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Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around.
So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of
God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out next week to
give him first communion and confirmation.'
>
Reverend Billy Bob the Baptist, spoke next. He was in a wheelchair,
had one arm and both legs in casts, and had an IV drip.
>
In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he exclaimed, 'WELL, brothers,
you KNOW that we Baptists don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And
then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted
nothing to do with me.
>
So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one
hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED
him and BAPTISED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle
as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus. Hallelujah!
>
The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was
lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors
running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape.
>
The Rabbi looked up and said: "Looking back on it, circumcision may not
have been the best way to start.
to the students of Vancouver University. They would get together two or
three times a week for coffee and to talk shop.
>
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really
all that hard, a real challenge would be to preach to a bear.
>
One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They would
all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert
it to their religion.
>
Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences.
>
Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had
various bandages on his body and limbs, went first.
>
'Well,' he said, 'I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism.
>
Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around.
So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of
God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out next week to
give him first communion and confirmation.'
>
Reverend Billy Bob the Baptist, spoke next. He was in a wheelchair,
had one arm and both legs in casts, and had an IV drip.
>
In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he exclaimed, 'WELL, brothers,
you KNOW that we Baptists don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And
then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted
nothing to do with me.
>
So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one
hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED
him and BAPTISED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle
as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus. Hallelujah!
>
The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was
lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors
running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape.
>
The Rabbi looked up and said: "Looking back on it, circumcision may not
have been the best way to start.
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