internet dates service

[drslump]

Hi all,

I haven't been around lately but it's nice to see that the "New Murc Game" is still going on!

The reason I didn't visit the site was because my girl left me and I felt very bad about it. Anyway I think now I'm ready to start a new relationship.

A couple of weeks ago I was thinking about using one of those internet dating services like match.com. Where you put a profile of yourself and can make selective searches and contact the people you like.

When I finished writing my profile I realized that I've done it in a way in which everything I wrote was true but trying to make it look nice.
I mean my hair is not blonde is a ligth brown, I used my best looking photo among dozens of them (cameras hate me ), I've been a couple of times to the theater or an art gallery but I counted it as my hobbies ...

If I've done it, I guess many people did the same so can I really believe in what I see in the profiles? I guess no.

Then it comes to the section where they ask what are you looking for : relationship, romance, friendship, trip partner ...
Hell, rigth now I'm looking for SEX, I know it's kind of sad to use the internet to find someone for that but I'm a shy person

At the end I choosed romance and relationship. Then my profile got aproved and two days later I got 3 girls who wanted to contact me I couldn't believe it.

One of them was twice my age, we didn't have any common interest (except for theater and art galleries).
The second one is living at 1.100 km from my home!!! no way I could get sex in the short term with her unless we do it thru the phone

Then came the last one, she was amazing. Short black hair, green eyes, pale skin, awesome smile. I checked her hobbies and she liked soccer, rock music and computers! among many other things and she lives just 35km away!!!
I thought we were made one for the other, it was like finding my other half.

I contacted her rigth away, we agreed to meet at a pub in her area.
I went to the pub at the specified time at the correct date but I couldn't see her. However she saw me and introduced herself, I was astonished, she was much more beautiful that I could have imagined looking at that blured photo of the profile.
We sat on a table to have a capuccino (or a "cup of cino" as a friend of mine from Walles used to call it), we started to talk about the weather and that stuff, then we moved into more interesting stuff but ....

she was the DUMBEST thing I've ever talked to (and I use to talk to everything animal, vegetal or inanimate). She laughted about everything I said, even when I excused myself to go to the toilet, she laught making a loud noise.
She didn't like soccer but Kluivert (F.C. Barcelona's striker), she didn't like computers but the shape of her flatmate's imac and what she thought was rock music was actually spanish country-pop music (the most cheesy one).

The date ended with me paying the drinks and blaming myself for being such an ****ole

I thought she enjoyed the date as much as I did but I was wrong. The day after she phoned me to go somewhere for dinner. I gave a silly excuse and told her that I'll phone sometime soon(tm).



I think I've wrote way too much.
Well my point is that you can't rely on profiles to know if a person suits you. I mean, if using an internet database driven date service, you probably need to have several dates 'til you find someone you like, honestly, I preffer to go down to the pub and just use the good old method of hanging at the bar getting drunk slowly and telling the poor bartenders about my boring life.
Perhaps one day I'll find my other half drinking besides me at the pub, I just hope I'll not be too drunk as to don't notice her


btw if you've ever used such a service don't be shy and share your experience with me.

see ya
ivan

PS: as always my most sincere apologies for my poort english, it keeps improving but slowly

[az]

Hey Ivan,

thanks for the interesting and honest read

From all the time I've spent on the net, I've learnt one thing (though it took me long to realize and I still don't live by it): NOTHING BEATS REAL LIFE.

Don't play an MMORPG, play offline with your friends (or find new ones if you've been on the net for too long ), don't use a date service (neither online nor offline), just go out. I'm really shy myself, but you've really got nothing to lose trying

Best wishes,

AZ

P.S.: Your english seems quite good to me Much better than what I've written lately...

[Wombat]

Talking with other friends of mine, it seems that you want less of a "match.com" and more "nerve.com" It's more for people just looking to to a little gettin'

[joonie]

Hope you find your match in a short term.
And thank you so much for sharing your experience.
I'll do the same when I have such a thing to talk about.

[drslump]

cheers guys,

I've phoned today to that cute (dumb) girl I wrote about.
I was feeling kind of bad for not telling her the true, well, I don't know if she liked me or not because she was all the time laughing :s
I told her that she look like a good girl and all but that she wasn't my type (I could have been more honest but...)
She wished me the best and I did the same.
I think she must be a very happy person if she is all the time laughing but you never know.
Anyway I think I really like a girl friend of mine but before I try something with her I'll have to make dissapear her boyfriend

ciao,
Ivan

[az]

*LOL yeah, make her Boyfriend dissappear

But I think this laughing all the time might just be a sign of nervousness. But I'm no giggling girl, so I don't know

AZ

[Sethos]

Originally posted by az
*LOL yeah, make her Boyfriend dissappear

But I think this laughing all the time might just be a sign of nervousness. But I'm no giggling girl, so I don't know

AZ

I think that this is true not just for women, but for both sexes really, I know some guys that laugh like crazy when they're nervous (which let me tell you is hell when you have to give a presentation in front of the class ) personally I always have a glass of water (no really I mean it; water ) that I tend to get refilled about every 5 - 10 min or so when I'm meeting someone new or who I REALLY like...yes I too am shy...

~Sethos

[joonie]

Maybe, on the other hand, that girl IS dumb. I mean dumb as in low IQ. If a person has IQ lower than 100, they think everything is funny. I got this idea when I read your article above, that as you excused yourself to the restroom, she just giggled. Or does she REALLY like you?
If I were you, I would just DO her and dump her when I get tired of her. . Very, very, very mean of me...
PS: is she cute? Put up a picture of her here. Come on!

[drslump]

LOL @ joonie

I thought about what you said about doing her but I'll feel bad after that, so I preffer to keep my gun in the safe some more time and feel good with myself

I'm a gentleman and as such I'll never put somebody else's photo on the net without his/her agreement but if you want I can give you her phone number. She doesn't speak english but maybe you can comunicate by signs

later, ivan

[az]

I find there's not many things as un-sexy as stupidity.

BTW, how come your name's Ivan and you live in spain?

AZ

[drslump]

totally agree az

Honestly, I don't know why my name is Ivan but there are lots of people named Ivan in Spain. However the pronunciation puts the stress on the "a" (Iván).
There not many "Ivan" older than 25 years old though.

I guess that a famous football player or a handsome summer-hit singer named Ivan came to Spain in the late 70s and lots of mothers-to-be felt in love with him

how come your name is "az"?

ciao, ivan

[az]

My name is Friedrich

AZ

[Drizzt]

Slump, maybe you have been too much fast on your judgement...

[drslump]

I don't think so...

I'm sure she was a good and loving person but I'm also sure that I'd not be able to have a meaningful conversation with her and that is a must for me.

It's like love at first sitght, only that this was a "she is not for me" at first sight.

life is short and unfortunatly I can't get to know everybody I meet in detail.

perhaps it was because she looks like my ex. but they have a completly different personality.

or perhaps is that I want a "cappuccino senza schiuma"

a dopo,
ivan

[agallag]

I'm having a bit of a problem at the moment too. My previous girlfriend and I broke up about 2 1/2 months ago (after 13 months together). I thought everything was going quite well up until our one year anniversary.

That's when I actually proposed to her (I've never told anyone else that until right now). She turned me down saying she didn't want a long engagement, and since we had bought a house together, we wouldn't be able to afford a wedding for quite a while. I accepted that at the time, but two weeks later, she decided to break it off. I'm still not sure why she did it, she said she just "lost the spark". Whatever. Anyway, we're in the process of backing out of the deal on the house (it's not built yet), and other than an occasional email to discuss that process, we don't even speak anymore. I think I'm pretty much over her now, and can see in hindsight it's probably for the best.

Since that time, I've been spending quite a bit of time with a group of friends that I work with. One of them is a female, and I think I may be falling for her pretty hard. She has exactly the personality I look for in a woman. She's extremely smart (degree in bio-chem), she has almost the exact same sense of humour as me, she works in the same field as me (active directory design and support, computer geek chick, woohoo!) and is one of the nicest, friendliest people I know.

The only issue is that she's a co-worker. Well, not really... she works on the same floor as me, but in a different department. We do have to deal with each other for work purposes fairly often, but not on a daily basis. We've been spending quite a bit of time together outside of work, but only in group, never just the two of us. I recently took up rock climbing (indoor), and I convinced her and another guy from work to join me. We've also gone out a few times to various events around town.

This saturday is our company's annual trip to Canada's Wonderland (theme park, rollercoasters, etc.) where they book the whole park just for employees. Working for a big bank has it's advantages Lots of quality time there, and she's just as big a rollercoaster freak as I am.

I think the clincher was when she asked to borrow my Monty Python and the Holy Grail DVD. Can't go wrong with a woman who is a Python fan, can you?

Now I just have to decide if I should ask her out or not, and if so, when. What should I do?