Orientation - adults only, please!

[High_Jumbllama]

Originally posted by Brian Ellis
. . . Notwithstanding, if two blokes wish to do it that way, that is their affair, as long as they don't try to involve me. Live and let live!

I pretty much agree with you on that, but I have had two instances with gay males that creeped me out. One decided to try to put his hands somewhat affectionately on my shoulders one day and the other tried to move in with me at college without telling me. I got along with them fine otherwise. They were very nice people.

Most of the problem guys in particular have with them and this affects me to an extent is that part of our self worth as we grow up into adulthood is that status and "coolness" is partially built up through sexual reputation whether real or perceived. So of course when our perception of ourselves in this away is affected many of us are very likely to feel threatened and we lash out.

[Umfriend]

What? Your self-image is affected by whether gays make a pass on you??

Oh, wait, sry, same is true for me I just realised. I was in Manhatten once, where in a PC shop one of the sales guys (young fella) made a pass at me. I felt flattered....

[gt40]

bi-sexual?
does that mean when you want sex, you have to buy it?

[High_Jumbllama]

Originally posted by Umfriend
What? Your self-image is affected by whether gays make a pass on you??

Oh, wait, sry, same is true for me I just realised. I was in Manhatten once, where in a PC shop one of the sales guys (young fella) made a pass at me. I felt flattered....

I am not saying it is right or whether or not it is wrong or right of me to think that way. It just is. If I explain myself further this could end up closed or in the temp forum so I will refrain.

[az]

/me applauds the mature and impartial way this is discussed. If this tone is kept up, I don't think the thread will end up in temp (though I am of course not a mod here).

I also find this thread very interesting

AZ

[Admiral]

Is all of the above a term for I'm (still) confused ?
I mean, bi should cover the first two.

[Indiana]

Originally posted by az

Actually, I have no problem at all with other peoples' sexual preferences,...(snip)...as long as they don't harass me with it

Now that's exactly my opinion. I really don't care if someone is gay, but I most definitely HATE gay/lesbian activists.

[Evildead666]

Straight. Have nooooo probs whatsoever with gay/lesbian, and when we're all together at a party, it makes for an eventful, fun time...

I'd just like to also point out that a friend/collegue of mine who is more so camp than Larry Grason ('generation game' for the Brits out there "Shut that door!", cue limp wrist) has much of a better love life than i ever have. A bloody magnet if there was one, and he's been pleasured by lesbians who were out for just some fun....i was away that weekend, but got to see the photos!!! (no pr0n)

Makes me wish to be him sometimes....

(if i find out what his 'magnet' is i'll be sure to post it here

[Jammrock]

You forgot to add trysexual. Will try anything. Not my orienteation, but I've know a few in my day.

[Evildead666]

Beastial ?

(too much?

[High_Jumbllama]

Yes. Way too much.

[Tempest]

I'd say I'm 85% heterosexual (I believe that most people saying that they're 100% hetero are lying, either to the audience or to themselves). I've never had a homoerotic experience, even as a child, but I do admire "beautiful" people of my own gender. Hell, I'm kinda artistic by nature so I admire a lot of beautiful things, but strangely enough, many of those beautiful men seem to be homosexual - so what I'm admiring could in fact be their androgynous or "feminine" appeal - kinda like a "perfect human".

Anyway, interacting with overfeminine men just feels too damn weird. It's like my brain is in a constant fight about whether it's a guy or a girl I'm talking with. Why should this be important? I don't know, I guess our brains just have this built-in need for classification. Or maybe it's some social pressure about how I shouldn't like this person because, although nice, he is biologically of the "wrong" gender and "goddamn, I'm not homosexual" and all that. Go figure, all I know is that I've had moments when I've been so alone and wanted closeness so much that the gender would probably not have mattered. Reminding you that I'm not talking sex here, just the need for another person to talk with and to comfort me. To me the way homosexual men are having sex with each other seems unnatural. I cannot see it serving any biological purpose, and find the idea itself somewhat disgusting (but that's just my opinion).

Off Topic:

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On another note, as you may have noticed I'm not very male by behavior myself. In fact, I often find myself behaving a little too girlishly for my own taste. I guess that has to do with my upbringing, since I was born with a twin sister and so we kinda received a "hybrid gender" upbringing. I'm also very caretaking by nature, and I guess that this is a trait more common in women than in men.

The funny thing is that (if we ignore the fact that I'm somewhat lightly built) nature has given me some external attributes of a "high-testosterone male", and so my natural looks are somewhat on the "ugly", or cold, side. This means that I'm sometimes approached by women who are in search of some kind of a macho bull, and they are of course let down when they discover that I'm not everything that they had hoped for (I can be a man if need be, but it has to be a situation where those primal instincts kick in). And then there are those nice, friendly, conversational girls that I'd rather hang out with, but they are somewhat scared to start a conversation with me because they think that I'm a brainless macho ****ole... So whatever people expect, I'm often pretty much different from their expectations, and they let me know it too

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Back on track - if this is what the actual discussion was about - just like many of the people who posted above I'm willing to live and let live. That is, if homosexual people don't bother me, then I won't bother them. It's just that I feel a little uneasy with them... Maybe I should interact with more gay people to learn to ignore their sexual tendencies and appreciate them as people?

[az]

Off Topic:

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Tempest, everyone needs physical closeness, and I think the best men are those not afraid of hugs and cuddles - fortunately my best friends aren't. Unforunately, they live a few hundred km away

About your looks: Maybe trying a different hairstyle would make you look less butch?

Oh, and the only male I find really attractive is my only gay friend. Maybe it really is because he's more feminine than other men (though he's still most certainly a man, but he's somewhat lightly built, little bodily hair etc. Maybe it's just his very warm (no pun) personality.)

---

AZ

[Lizzard[MPE]]

Originally posted by Tempest
Maybe I should interact with more gay people to learn to ignore their sexual tendencies and appreciate them as people?

possibly. my older brother curt is gay. and he told me when i was 7 years old. everyone in the family was shocked. my mother and sisters cried...etc. and he said when he told me, i looked up at him and said "thats cool" and he asked me if that was ok and he said i said "ofcourse, you're my brother" and then i smiled at him.

who cares about sexual preference anymore these days. everyone is their own person, and we should love everyone for who they are and what they will become.

in the words of lizzie "its all good"

oh and btw, im heterosexual myself

[Lizzard[MPE]]

and might i say very good job on being well behaved fellow murcers i was taking a deep breath when i was entering the thread. <claps>