Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?

[ALBPM]

Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?



Question:
How do you tell the difference between democrats, republicans
and southern republicans?

Answer:
Pose the following question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two
small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge
knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams
obscenities, raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a
Glock .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds
before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?


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Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or Oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to
attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife
out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of
message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just
to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get
away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have
a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healther street
that would discourage such behavior.
This is so confusing!
I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try
to come to a consensus.


------------------------------------------------------------------------
Republican's Answer:

BANG!

------------------------------------------------------------------------
Southern Republican's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
click....(sounds of reloading).
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
click.
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester
Silver Tips?"
__________________

[Technoid]

Sigh

[GNEP]

Pose this question:

You work as a chef. One day you are alone in the kitchen chopping vegetables with a big knife. You accidentally cut yourself quite badly on the finger. You look for a first-aid kit but can't find one, so swearing blindly run out of the kitchen into the alleyway at the back heading towards the local clinic. You do remeber one thing from first-aid lessons - keep the bleeding bit aloft. So you raise your cut hand (which in your confusion is holding the knife), and run round the corner into a nearly deserted street....

What would you prefer the man walking towards you is?

[Umfriend]

@ GNEP

Just goes to show, men should not be in the kitchen.

Why isn't there a Eurotwit option?

[ALBPM]

BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG! BANG!BANG!BANG!

Pre-Ban magazine plus one in the chamber

[MultimediaMan]

We shall be returning to pre-ban status in 81 calendar days....

[Jammrock]

Of course, only the North Americans get the joke.

Jammrock

[Dr Mordrid]

Republican. Just one "BANG", but it's a .50 caliber spitting 500 grain bullets. Not only are the bullets deadly but the muzzle blast can deafen anyone for a city block

Dr. Mordrid

[UtwigMU]

I'd say, I'm proabably a republican with only difference that I don't own or carry a gun.

[Sasq]

need another Answer...
Australian, throw the gun away and rip him to peices with your bare hands, Americans are pussies

[Dr Mordrid]

Would you prefer that I use my edged hunting boomerang?

Dr. Mordrid

[Sasq]

The boomerang is acceptable, but only because your family is present

[KvHagedorn]

I thought the Aussie answer was:

"Heh. That's not a knife.. (draws massive bowie knife bigger than a katana).. THAT's a knife!"

[Jammrock]

Of course, if it's a mom, she nags the attacker until his eardrums explode and topples from blodd loss.

Jammrock

[mmp121]

One shot dead square between the eyes since I'm an "expert" shot.

In reality I have never held let alone shot a gun in my life...