Love?

[RedRed]

Hey, CB...

Dont tear your self up.
Be a friend to the girl, the third wheel, as you say, but try to keep it at that, until you are sure you know how your marriage is.

you said it yourself, there could be enough estrogen in this equation, you dont need it complicated.

Rags does talk sense though as well... (Hell I even agree with him!! )

I know it can be lonely, I have been there

[cbman]

Arggghhhh..

Lets just say I found out how that other girl feels for me.

We got drunk together and although there was no "Physical Contact" we ended up talking most of 3 or 4 hours and she let slip that if I had been single and in the same spot that I was in that minute she would be all over me like a fat kid on a smartie (Those weren't her words.. but it gives you the just of it)

Meanwhile.. the wife has been really nice to me since she blew up at me and except for being really snippy at me, has made life bearable at home..

My solution for now.

Keep my friend close (But not too close)
Keep my wife as happy as possible

I think she knows that I am not too impressed anymore by her tantrums...

Lets see where I am next week or so... only time will tell

[Wombat]

I think you're just being fooled, to be blunt. Your wife still has that mean streak. It won't just go away.

If she won't at least try marriage counseling, leave her. If your marriage is strong enough to keep together, she'll stick with you as you try to help her get the help she needs.

[cbman]

Very true... I (in the spirit of Christmas) am giving her one last chance...

But the next time she starts getting all uppity and in my face and says she is going to call her parents to pick her up (The next day) I am going to tell her to pack her bags because I am takin her home to save her parents the money on gas.

I won't try to convince her to stay (Like before), I won't just let things simmer down until she reconsiders... I will help her pack what she wants to take right away and take the van and drive her home...

It would be one of the hardest trips I would ever have to make and there would be alot of stuff to sort out. (Most of the stuff in the apartment is from her parents) And I would probably get rid of the apartment and the High Speed Internet, and the cable tv and move back in with my parents (It would save me 700 or more dollars a month... which would be almost 10000 dollars a year) and it would really help me to control my debtload and still have money to play with.

But like I said.. one last chance

[Bohrn]

Best of luck, and good for you to give it a last try! But, like I said earlier, you need to be happy for the rest of your life, and the sooner that happens the better.

Seems, I was right about the other girl too, hehe!

But like Wombat says, she's mean. Even your sig says it. You need a partner that doesn't take your good system, but shares it with you.

[The Rock]

Any woman that dared to lay a finger on my nerd gear would be immediately killed, no matter how beautiful she was. Sorry to hear about the problems cbman; women can be the most cruel creatures on the planet at times. I think I'd rather be shot or stabbed than screwed around by a woman again; it would hurt less.

Bart, staying single forever

[KvHagedorn]

Hey CB..

I hadn't responded to this thread because I didn't really know what to advise, but now that I have reread it, it seems like you guys really made a mistake. Terrible and unfortunate as it is, you are probably better off without her. She seems to have a split personality, which would be enough to get me outta there real quick, even if I loved her. I was in love with a woman once whose morals just were all outta whack. As painful as it was, I let her go. I knew it would just come to naught in the end. To tell you the truth, I always thought it was kind of odd that you would give her your best computer anyhow. Best to remember about any relationship, give love but don't give blood. That computer is yours, man. If her priorities were straight she would be happy to let you keep it. She may not even be truly capable of love, at least at this point. I would advise her to get some counseling, (I hate when people advise that but in this case it really seems she is a candidate for it.) Best of luck to you, buddy.

[cbman]

Its not about the computer. (Which doesn't even matter much to me... who needs more than 640k memory anyways) as I am not quite that possesive of my toys. (In fact the slower one does everything that I need it too.

My friend got a part time job right next to the store (Well its one over and across the street. And she is having the wife babysit so that means that she will have something to do... playing with the baby may take her mind off of the fact that I don't want one yet and she will be making some money on her own.

It could be what she needs to get out and make contacts. (My friend knows alot of people from town and if she is hanging out with the wife then she might just find someone with a job that she will like and then she will have something to do besides brood on the fact that I am working so damn hard all the time.)

I will just have to wait and see.

Thanks for your support and I will post in this thread with whatever ends up being the end result.

It probably won't be until christmas or slightly afterwards that everything will fall into place..

Thanks once again guys (And ladies)

[The Rock]

In spite of all of the bad crap, I hope you have a Merry Christmas man. Here's hoping it all works out in the end.

Bart

[cbman]

Or at least something good comes from it.


Merry Christmas for everyone else and may yours be much better than mine may potentially be.

[Dr Mordrid]

I'll be an advocate for taking the long perspective.

After my first wife and I separated many years ago (over her infidelity) I was extremely distraught. For a long time I kept beating myself over the head wondering what I had done wrong and how I could have prevented her from going astray.

After two years I realized what everyone who knew us was saying, including her friends, was correct: SHE was the one who screwed up.

It was then I also realized that I was better off without the b****.

Soon after that I met the love of my life and now realize all things work out for the best, even if it does cause pain at the moment. If she hadn't gone astray I have no doubts I wouldn't have the blessings I have now.

Dr. Mordrid

[RedRed]

wishing ya the best.....

be careful..

RedRed

[cbman]

Happy New Year

Well.

If she follows through with her threat she is leaving sometime this week.

She says she has had enough of living with someone who is never there and puts everything else first. That I will never change and that she doesn't even know why we got married in the first place.

Happy New Year I guess

[RedRed]

Sorry to hear that, man


RedRed

[Wombat]

I'm not man. I'm sorry your wife didn't turn out to be a healthy, stable person, but it sounds as if her absence will be a blessing. She's just trying to manipulate you, leaving until <B>you</B> change to adapt to her whims. Surprise her, and don't cave to her puppeteering. Hell, offer to help pack her bags.

Just don't be premature with this other friend of yours, or the divorce proceedings will leave you a wreck.